Questions Lesbians Get Asked

Are you questioning who you are? Why?

I am talking sexual orientation here. I have a lot of people asking me questions like "Julie, how would I know if I'm straight/gay/lesbian/bi etc." Perhaps its because I'm an outspoken proud lesbian, I don't know.

I don't really understand how you can be confused with your sexual orientation, but I get that you can be...

I knew the moment I was able to comprehend romantic relationships. Right away I looked at my life and said "will I ever be able to settle down, get married, have kids, with a man." Right away I knew the answer was "NO."

It's not all to do with sex. Everyone thinks sex feels good. People don't understand the whole strap on concept with lesbians. "Why don't you just do the real thing?" Obviously, we would if we wanted to. Penetration feels good. For me, men don't. I will never find comfort or happiness lying next to a man.

I can't really explain what the difference is. Truth is, its not really whether you like men or women more, its who you are able to fall in love with. Ive been living as a lesbian for years, and never came across a man that I was attracted to, never got that "wow" feeling. Never wanted that.

Anyways, fuck it, I cant explain it.

Some questions I've been asked over the years:

"How do you know you are a lesbian if you've never slept with a man?"

UHM- HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU'RE STRAIGHT IF YOU'VE NEVER SLEPT WITH A MAN(FOR GUYS) OR A WOMAN(FOR GIRLS)????

You don't have to sleep with the same sex to know if you're gay or not, that's horse shit. LIKE I SAID. Its not all about sex. Its about love and emotion and happiness. I don't want to wake up to: "Good morning babe," coming from a manly voice. Hahaha.

"How do you 'do it'?"

What the hell do you mean how do we "do it." How the hell do you do it? We have fingers, and toys, and bodies that can be just as close as a man and a woman's. Think about it.

"Who's the guy," or "Who wears the pants?"

Pretty sure we both have worn pants in our life time. And last time I checked, pretty sure both of us were girls. Its called a lesbian relationship. Meaning: Two Females. One of us cannot be a guy.

"When did you become a lesbian?"

When my mother had sex with my father.

"Why do you shove it in our faces, why do you flaunt it?"

Why do you shove it in our faces about how were going to hell because we're gay, or that were disgusting? Stop shoving "straight" in our faces if you don't want us to fight back.

"Are you sure it just isn't a phase?"

Don't phases end? Well, I'll be damned. I'm still waiting for this "gay" phase to end. Did you actually mean to ask "Do you know how to think and understand your attractions?" Rude.

"Were you sexually abused by a man when you were younger?"

First of all, who the hell asks someone this? And- were you? If yes, why are you not gay? If no- then are you gay? If you are you must of been abused as a child..... NOT ALL GAY/LESBIAN PEOPLE WERE ABUSED. For the record, you will never know if I was sexually abused before asking me this bullshit. You don't ask something like that- you get told. Have a little fucking respect..

"Do you hate men?"

Plain and simple: NO. I might say it sometimes, but I don't mean it.

"Do you make a move on the first date?"

Do you? I hope not.

"So uhm, do you like wanna get with me?"

Dude- just because you're a female friend, and I'm into chicks, DOES NOT mean I'm into you. Fuck sakes, jump off your horse ;) And no, I don't gawk at every big-breasted- bikini wearing- pretty lady out there.

"Is that girl your with your girlfriend?"

Uhm, no, dude, that's my mom. Not every girl I'm seen with is my partner- you fool.

"Do you feel like your in the wrong body, like your a woman in a mans body?"

I sure as hell hope there's no man in my body- that would creep me the fuck out.

"You know I'm straight, right?"

Don't re-assure yourself, again, jump off your high horse.

"Have you read the bible?"

God loves ALL of his children. Just so you know- the bible also says "Only God has the right to judge."

Anyways, theres lots more, but theres a few. Now you know!

I've been trying to figure out how to explain this to you, and apparently my mind is drawing a blank. Its another thing, like my "Love" post- you just know.